Thursday, October 22, 2009

Warm & fuzzy feelgoods

I've written adneseum about support groups, and yes, I still read them occasionally. There interesting in some ways, and perhaps helps in many other ways where people know they're not alone and know others apparently care. I say apparently because I wonder if forums are just another warm and fuzzy feelgood, kinda' the Internet hug. Good for the time you're reading it but gone not long after you leave the forum.

I say this because when someone talks about their depression or other feelings, there's some to many responses about "caring" for them, but that's all they are. They don't know each other outside the forum, so if told some stranger about your depression and only got a sympathic or empathic look and a hug back, would it matter? Would it help?

I mean really help how you're feeling and how you can get through, resolve or answer some problem, issue or feeling? Wouldn't talking with someone who knows you or knows your situation or circumstances help more? Wouldn't they be better in the long run to help you change?

So why do so many use these forums instead of finding real people who really know and care?

Yes, I know many don't have friends or can't afford drugs or therapists, and many don't want to talk about their feelings and emotions with others who are so close, but they'll talk to total strangers they know very little if anything about in forums?

I'm not the one to critcize or complain, I'm just observing. And I know these forums helps many, just expressing their thoughts out loud to a group of strangers far away who don't have that real connection to them. Sometimes just shouting helps and the more it's anonymous the better.

It's why I love solo walking and hiking. To stand in places where no is at the moment and feel totally alone. Almost the opposite of those who love to stand in crowds and be anonymous. It's our own individual way of seeing where and who we are in the world, and it doesn't really matter how, just that it does.

In the end, it's not any of that which really matters, but what you think and feel in your heart and mind, and sometimes a warm and fuzzy feelgood hits the spot, an emotional scoop of ice cream when it's most needed and tastes great. And who cares five minutes later.

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