Wednesday, April 11, 2012

The Easiest Thing

The easiest thing is to hate yourself. To blame yourself for everything. For everything that has happened to you, everything you are and everything you did, even if it wasn't your fault or your doing. To believe it's you, no one else and nothing else, not even for a moment. It's you because you don't need anyone else, only yourself.

To shame yourself into thinking, knowing and believing you are the one who is the source of all your anger and hate about yourself, all the hate and anger with yourself, and all the hate and anger at yourself. No one else. Only you and just you. Shame is what you give yourself, blame is what you tell yourself, and hate is what you verbally abuse and beat yourself.

You don't need or want anyone else. You just want to shrink away and hide. To sit in the darkness not wanting, and even afraid, to turn on the light to know you are the only one there, the one you hate. The easiest thing in the world.

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